If you are waiting
If you are waiting for a man to come into your life to make it all better.
Stop waiting for someone to come save you. To save you from your life. To save you from boredom. To save you from loneliness.
There is no one. No one is coming.
It’s only you. It’s you, with yourself, by yourself.
How does this make you feel? What comes to your mind?
Are there feelings of loneliness, misery, lack and loss? Are the old stories about being unloveable, unwanted, un-chosen, un-everything swirling in your mind – or is there… Something else?
Hope, perhaps? Stirrings of excitement? Feelings of possibility?
Collectively, as women, we have to paint this something else for ourselves. For the world. We have to sing, paint, draw, dance, weave this something else into life. Whether partnered or not. In love or not. Do not give in; do not give up on bringing to life the world that is so rich and fertile within you. You have to share the seeds that were planted in you from birth. It is your job to express it, watch it grow, nurture it, spread it…
You may not know what it is yet, but that does not matter. Your willingness will show you the way.
Because you contain entire Universes. You have no idea how large you are.
I am often asked: Where are all the spiritual men at? When is my lover going to come? Where is he?
And now I want to ask of you: what do you expect this man to do, in your life? What do you expect him to bring into your life? Is some part of you holding your breath? Are you holding back because you’re saving something essential, while waiting for this experience?
It is so very natural to seek love and companionship. But we are collectively waking up from dreams of fantasy-fueled romantic relationships. If you are un-partnered: the time is over for rehashing those old tales of rejection, of being unloveable. Of there being something wrong with you. For buying into those tired tropes of singlehood as a sign of – failure? weakness?
Even in the most stable of love relationships, you are not exonerated from the responsibility of living your life to the fullest. You cannot abandon your life to merge with another.
You have done this for many lifetimes.
For many lifetimes, you have held up families. You have given your life to your husband and your children. You have given the best of yourself to support others. In this lifetime, many women are being called – to rise to the challenge, to give of ourselves, yes – but for our own personal creative satisfaction – and by extension, to enrich the world.
To heal the world. To be guardians of the Earth. To be teachers of truth. Warriors of peace.
To suck the marrow out of life. To drape it in flowers. To write across the sky.
To be as big and as expansive as you can possibly be. Whether partnered or not. You are being asked to love – to reach for the highest expression of love possible – universal love. Love for the world. Love for our Earth. Love for existence.
We are asked to develop a steely loyalty to ourselves, first and foremost, to our own creative souls, to be fiercely self-loving – and when love comes to you, embodied in the form of a man, it is because you already are embodying love, and you will no longer consider abandoning yourself to merge with another. It is not even possible to do so, because no one who truly loves you will ask you to abandon yourself for their sake.
You will not be tempted to compromise yourself because you are already fiercely, devastatingly, relentlessly in Love with your true self.
Instead, it will be an invitation in co-creation. It will be a solid rootedness. No crutches, no fantasies, no codependencies.
You are to look beyond the understanding of love as something contained within a romantic relationship, and to see it in all relationships, in all of existence.
Yes, some of us will discover this love within a partnership. Some of us will discover this love in heartbreak. Some of us will discover it in community, in a cause, in a transcendent experience. There are so many paths that lead to this Love. They all come with their own challenges. One is no better than the other. They are just different.
And what I know for sure is, only the women who are capable of this Love, who are awakened to the Truth, who are fiercely and bravely evolving – are being put to the test right now. Are being asked of this challenging task. If you were not capable of this, you would not be called. You would not be asked.
So, live. Bravely, with confidence, with a fiery commitment to yourself and your personal truths. With an unflinching honesty towards yourself. With loyalty to your visions. With conviction and courage. Speak out loud. Do not censor your thoughts and your creative impulses. Gaze upon all that breaks your heart in this world and resolve to work for its healing. Above all, heal all that is unresolved in your heart, with the care and concern of a mother for her newborn. And instead of lack and loneliness, you will find abundance, blessings, joy, and Love that is all-encompassing, beyond your wildest dreams.
You will no longer find yourself seeking for this love outside of yourself, because you already are Love. Everything else is a bonus.