Monthly Archives

November 2018

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For the broken hearted


If you let love in, love annihilates. Love requires one to die over and over again. Old habits, ideas of who you are, false programming, assumptions, fantasies about yourself and the other cannot pass muster in these times. Relationships end if they are held together by mere fantasies. If life is showing you these cracks and vulnerabilities in your relationships, good. You are lucky. Life is not allowing you to live half-heartedly. Life does not want you to settle for less than true love.

Love is not always soft and nurturing, it can be violent, uncompromising, even terrifying. (Violent not as in physical violence — but a kind of violence that does not allow you comforting half-truths, and does not attempt to coddle). We can spend our whole lives running away from love, but what we are really doing is running away from life — and ourselves.

In order to know true love, one has to move past the deception that love is something that is only found outside of ourselves, or only exclusively in romantic relationships. That is the type of love that always keeps you wanting, searching, and empty in search of fulfillment.

True love lies in the consciousness that you ARE love.

We are afraid of what awaits at the end of the high, of the honeymoon, of the dwindling light. What awaits in the dark? The abandoned parts of ourselves that we have shunned and rejected, deemed unworthy of love.

When we search perennially for another to love us, what we are really saying is:

“Love the parts of me I cannot love. Show me that it is okay to love the parts of me that I can’t even bear to look at. Show me that I am okay.”

And for that, I have seen people do anything, absolutely anything for that approval. For that signal that we are finally okay, that we are finally worthy of love now.

But inevitably, we will be crushed. We will be heartbroken. Because no one else can love us perfectly, the way we are meant to be loved — by ourselves, first and foremost. Because love is about wholeness, not about looking for that missing piece: it is about accepting our imperfections, and not just accepting them, but holding them in tenderness, in compassion for our own humanity. And no longer turning away out of shame, rejection or despair.

Where is the love? I hear people question. Do you believe in love? As though love is just a mere concept. And it shall remain a mere concept, if one does not move beyond holding oneself in judgement, in separation, in contempt.

In order to be the love that you are, and for that love to be reflected back to you in relationship, you have to start gently excavating the lost, the rejected, the broken, the ugly parts of yourself, hold them up to the light, start to know them, accept them, and say “I see you. It is okay. Just be.”

0 In Monthly Wisdom Scopes

Your November 2018 Wisdom Scopes



Daughter of Pentacles

Dear Pisces, you’ve come so far, and now you are at a place where you can start to make some of your long-cherished plans real. And this time, you won’t have to do it the old way where there was a lot of pushing and struggling. It used to be about trying to move seemingly immovable people and objects around to get what you needed, and as a result of that you developed a kind of defensive mechanism where you came at things with 10 times the aggression really necessary for something to happen – which tended to exhaust you and burn you out. Throughout that process, you’ve now realized that yes, working hard is necessary, but that stepping back and allowing the Universe to do its thing is just as crucial. You’ve internalized and embodied a sense of allowing that used to be so difficult for you. And it’s all part of the upgrades that’s been coursing through your system – this is a big deal. You’ve been initiated into ways that are infinitely more about flowing and allowing, and along with that, a sense of trust in the unfolding of the Universe. And the beauty of all of this is that a lot of what you dream and imagine will fall into place so much more effortlessly than before! This month, continue to embody this belief. Accept that the solution is always available, and that all is already well. See and experience just how magical your life already is. 



A new hope has birthed in your world – but beyond that, it has been about allowing yourself to melt into the new possibilities that have presented themselves to you. Often, you may find yourself acting out of fear that things aren’t really that great, or that it will somehow be taken away from you. There are memories of times when you had to hustle and push really hard through obstacles, squeezing the most you could out of anything that came your way. It was tough, scarcity-related, tooth-and-nail type of stuff. You experienced betrayal and heartbreak, or disappointments and grief. But instead of letting that harden you, you have instead opened up and allowed yourself to believe in the silver lining of it all. Above all, you allowed yourself to move forward in love, openness and hope instead of cynicism and guardedness. November will allow more of your new reality to anchor in and convince you: things are different now. You’re allowed to breathe, to relax into this new reality. Above all, there will be confirmations at every turn to convince you to keep doing what you’re doing, you’re on the right track. Expect random blessings to show up for you, my love. You are worthy of every single one. 


10 of Wands

This month, it’s all about allowing all that you have rejected within yourself and others to reveal themselves to you, for healing and acceptance. Sounds simple enough, but you might already have been experiencing it, and it really isn’t a walk in the park! So things that used to trigger you, push you off-kilter and repel you are about to pop up and say “Hi, remember me?” and the trick is to simply watch your response. Get curious about why you respond the way you do, without judgement. See if not responding in the old, conditioned ways actually causes the thing to lose its power over you. This month, your struggles are illusions – in the sense that it is entirely possible to opt out at any moment. Resist doing everything the hard way, or to push yourself too hard. You may gravitate towards those feelings because you are used to it, but these times represent a huge opportunity to detach from these very habits – of thought, behavior and feeling – that used to tie us down into mechanical ways of being. The way out of it is through compassion and forgiveness – for the you that used to believe you had to do everything on your own, and for anyone who may have let you down. You’re ready for new ways, free up your energy by refusing to be hooked in to habitual patterns, one moment at a time. You can do it! You are 100% capable of this, and your awareness of it means that half the battle is already won. 


Mother of Pentacles

Something magical has taken place in your heart recently – and it has to do with forgiveness, with letting go of long-time patterns, and a purging of the stories that have circled around your mind for the longest time. ‘Goodbye, baggage – I’m done with you.’ You’ve seen how a lot of it has strangled the life out of the good stuff that has been going on in your life, and you’re tired of giving the past so much space. And now, all of a sudden, it seems like you have all this room and levity in your soul. It feels strange, new, as though you’re someone else… And you are! You’ve been made new again, and you now want to share this grace with the world. In November, follow these urges. You have a newfound confidence that Spirit has got your back, that you’ve never been abandoned or lost. Your being brings people peace and calm, and they will just love being around you because of the different quality of your light. This month, keep coming back to yourself in these ways, by reminding yourself that you are always being loved and supported. Breathe through every obstacle and remember to pause and lean into your intuition before reacting emotionally. Things are still not what they seem at this moment, as worlds change and shift, so allow the truth to reveal itself to you in time. Oftentimes, you will find that an emotional reaction was not necessary at all. 


9 of Cups

I see you feeling very much at home with your body and where you are emotionally in November, dear Scorpio, even if things in the external world aren’t exactly where you want them to be yet. But there’s a new you emerging, who doesn’t need things out there to look exactly right for YOU to feel alright inside. And the beauty of that is that it shows you have been increasingly staying with what it means to always be aligned with Spirit, a profound a sense that everything’s always alright – no matter what. That you are where you are meant to be right now. And this is what has shifted for you profoundly, leading to an increase in your enjoyment of the here and now. Your senses are heightened, and every song, every meal, every mundane little moment becomes infused with magic and sensual pleasure. As a result, your desires flow to you easily, without effort. Without that anxiety-provoking need to control or micromanage every moment. This new softness looks good on you, dear Scorpio. You set others at ease and help them to open up to their own alignment with Spirit. 


Son of Pentacles

Dear Libra, you may find yourself being faced with choices this month. It’s the struggle between heart and mind that you often find yourself trying to balance. The difference this time is that you are able to more firmly anchor down one or the other – so which do you choose? Instead of using your mind to decide, use your body. Each time you’re confronted with a crossroads, choose what feels good to you, allows your body to relax, to open, to connect with more joy, peace and relaxation. Sometimes your mind wants things for you that definitely offer you the stimulation that you enjoy so much – but at the end of the day, just isn’t nurturing for your body, heart and soul. Whenever possible, connect with and observe that part of you that craves stimulation, and see what is the true emotion that underlies all of it. Is it a sense of emptiness that you may be reflexively turning away from? If so, your soul is calling for your attention. Give it your precious time. Sit with it for a while. For those who isn’t feeling this influence, you are feeling the increasing call to use your skills and talents to serve a higher good, or to increase in your commitment and dedication to an existing task. See if you are ready to give yourself more fully to it, as you are more than ready to step up to the plate. 


Father of Wands

A month of life force consciously directed, I’m feeling that the month of November will be very satisfying for you in terms of concrete results and real-world rewards, dear Virgo. It will be the kind of growth you can chart, see and touch – all your intangible efforts made tangible. You’ve been marinating in the soup of soul growth for a while now, as all of us have, but you have been remade especially in terms of some of your harsher, more unforgiving thought processes. All of this will culminate in a sense of feeling more supported, effective and powerful in this world. Remember: your power comes from you being who you are – consciously in connection with the heart and soul, the truth of your being. It can be derived from nowhere else. You will be also feeling a general urge to connect with like-hearted souls, and I am seeing that you will be doing just that – just be aware that moths are also drawn to the light, and not all will necessarily be the right crowd for you. Use discernment. Above all, be proud of yourself for all your hard work, growing and changing. You’re transmuting a lot of dense, disembodied intellectualizing energy into heart energy for the world, and this is not at all an easy task.  


2 of cups, reversed

Keeping your heart open in this world can be a heroic task, dear Leo, but it’s also one that you’re uniquely suited for. Opportunities will be showing up for you in November to let you know that it’s okay to let down that guard a little more, and to allow light into some of those dustier corners that you’ve been hiding from the world. You have so much to offer, and it doesn’t make sense to hide away any longer! Shielding your heart won’t make you stronger – on the contrary, it’s through revealing it that truly builds up your courage. You are protected in this process, especially when you do so without expectation of any particular reaction or response, but simply from a desire to be who you are. “This is who I am.” When declared with true self-acceptance, this changes absolutely everything. Know that it is safe for you to do so. Suddenly, you spend much less energy shielding yourself, and more energy simply expressing the joy of your being, and genuinely giving of yourself to others. In the process though, you may come up against old memories, habits and patterns that require your acknowledgement and release. Do this by moving through the feelings without attaching any story or meaning to it… You are ready to move in love, be in love, be love. Do not be surprised if this come in the form of deepened relationships or new relationships this month. 


10 of Pentacles

Have you been feeling like you’re trying to herd a bunch of wild animals through your life and you’re having a hard time? They’re all running and tripping and falling all over the place and nothing ever stays where it should. It’s given you the sense that maybe you just need to stop trying to control the external elements of your life and simply allow everything to be where they are at. November will feel like the calm after the storm – as pieces of your life shift and settle, you will find that an unshakeable sense of peace has taken over in your life. This sense of peace – and the realization that you are always fundamentally okay, no matter what, is a profound shift for you. It may not look like much on the surface, but a lot of the underlying anxiety that used to drive many of your actions has now been dissolved and channeled instead into a quiet confidence. The results of your efforts are now culminating into a beautiful sense of abundance, and it’s going to be tangible too. So a new job, new move, new opportunity, new relationships – these are all on the table for you, and more. Take your time to discern which you’d like to experience – they aren’t going away, and you won’t have to worry that you’ll miss out on anything. Dear Cancer, allow yourself to savor your new sense of self, and spend time nurturing this peace every day through conscious solitude. 


Ace of Swords

New beginnings are coming through strongly this month, dear Gemini. A lot of the plans you thought you were about to carry out either had their timelines drastically shortened or just upended completely, bringing you closer to your goals than you imagined possible. This beginning has to do with a new way of thinking or looking at a certain thing – and it represents a complete paradigm shift. You can no longer approach something with the same eyes or the same attitude. It’s as though you realized you were looking at the world through a keyhole and now you suddenly have a 360-degree perspective on things. This also speaks about your sense of justice, ideals, and principles. Whereas you used to be okay going along with whatever was the status quo in your industry or within your relationships, you are suddenly decidedly not okay. You’re all about drawing the lines and establishing boundaries – and standing by them without wavering. You’re realizing just how far reaching your words and your ideas are, too. And this is a feeling that you’re relishing. This month, any obstacles you face are put in place to help you further hone in on what you do care strongly about. Instead of seeing them as things to be avoided or dreaded, treat them like the learning opportunities they really are. It’s an exciting month of possibilities!


8 of Swords

Dear Taurus, this is the month to continue breaking out of self-imposed limitations. But this time, you won’t be doing it out of some belief that you aren’t good enough or that you need to constantly improve yourself. Nope. It will be because something has blossomed in you that whispers to you in your quiet moments: “You are already good enough. You are already worthy.” And this has been changing the way you approach absolutely everything: from relationships, to work, to your relationship with yourself, above all. And as this is happening, you may have to spend time unraveling the decisions you made and paths you set out on when you were eager to prove something to someone (or yourself) or when your sense of self-love wasn’t so solidly intact. You may be tested and prodded and you may be pushed off-center emotionally. It’s okay. Just keep coming back to yourself. Keep coming back to your still, quiet center within. It’s always waiting there for you. This is the work you do to pick apart the knots, make sense of what’s worth keeping, what’s going straight to the trash and what to simply let go of. Beware of old feelings of victimization coming up for you – each time you feel like someone is ‘doing something’ to you or ‘making you’ feel a certain way, try to step back and take an empowered stance. How do you take back your power in the situation? The key here is to use the emotion generated as a way to figure out what beliefs you still hold about your powerlessness, or lack of agency. Some may be true about the dynamics you’ve put yourself in, but they aren’t written in stone. The moment you realize you have the freedom to cut through the binds you’ve found yourself in, everything changes.


Lovers, reversed

In November, you will be asked to look ever more deeply at the relationship you truly have with yourself. How do you withhold love from yourself? Do you only deem yourself worthy when you have achieved a certain goal, or checked a box that said ‘I am finally good enough’? My dear Aries, you are always worthy. You are always good enough. I wish you could see it, deep in your sensitive heart of hearts, and believe it truly. Some prodding into the messages you received in childhood will be helpful, just to see that they are no longer relevant and helpful for your life right now. Any feeling of low self-worth, lack of self-belief, fear, anxiety and self-criticism that come up for you this month are simply opportunities to be seen and heard without buying into them. See if you can witness them without feeling the need to continue the narrative and list 10 more things that prove that those thoughts are true. Because what’s awaiting at the end of this process is a realization of the thoughts and patterns that have held you prisoner are simply paper tigers – just a little puff and they topple over. Without your energy and investment, they crumble into nothingness. And what’s left at the end of it is a pure, unwavering love that is the truth of your being.